Love | 11.30.2023

20+ Sexy Gifts for Your Spouse

Couple exchanging sexy gifts for Christmas.

By Franki Hanke

If you celebrate your holidays privately with your spouse, partner, or loved one, then it’s the perfect opportunity to wrap up something extra surprising. Plus, there’s no better way to stay warm when the weather outside is frightful than these sexy gifts. 


If you do celebrate a family holiday, schedule a private date night around the holidays to gift one of these items and provide a bit of one-on-one time in a busy season. Maintaining your normal relationship can be part of resisting stress too. 

Re-use these recommendations for Valentine’s Day gifts next! 

Etiquette for Gifting Sexy Gifts

If this isn’t part of your normal traditions, a sexy gift could be surprising. That’s exciting, but be mindful. 

What does this gift say? 

Like any gift, what you pick for someone has subtext. If you gift someone a new treadmill when they haven’t shown any interest in a new workout routine, it reads, “You should exercise more!” So, be sure you’re purchasing these items with your recipient in mind, not yourself. For lingerie or items, you can be adventurous but stay close to their comfort zone.

Alternatively, pick something out that you’ll use or wear and gift it more as a flirtation: “I got this to wear for you.” or “I want to use this with you.”

What’s your intent?

A sexy gift can seem like the golden ticket to having more sex (if you’re not having as much as you’d like), but it’s not. It could be part of it though! Work on other aspects ahead of and alongside your sexy Christmas gift exchange so your gift is just a part of your sex life. 

Want to know more? Read How to Re-Invigorate Your Sexless Marriage

Best Sexy Gifts for Your Partner

Flirty & Romantic Gifts

If you’re sneaking just one sexy gift into their stocking or this is your first foray, these items might be the best gifts: a little flirty, but not overtly sexual. A “sex gift” doesn’t need to be kinky or overtly sexual to have the right undertone. 

Massage Oil Candle

Gift an item and the promise for some time together with this conveniently pourable massage candle that melts into a pourable massage oil from LixCandles on Etsy. 

Santal 33 eau de parfum is one of our picks for sexy gifts to give your partner.

Perfume or Colonge

Rather than a cheesy aphrodisiac product, gift them a perfume or cologne with a note: “Tonight, wear this, only this.” Choose one of their favorites or one of these options recommended for being seductive, sensual scents. 

If you’re worried about picking a perfect gift, buy a travel size of your chosen fragrance so they can use it up easily and decide how they’d like it. You may make a tradition of trying new scents and seeing how they effect the both of you! 

If you’re long-distance or either travels frequently for work, gift them your signature scent as a way to feel connected. Scent is a powerful memory trigger, so you can use this to remind them of when you are together. 

A candle-making kit in Christmas scents makes a good romantic gift for your spouse.

Date Night Activity Kit

There’s no shortage of cheesy, “romantic” card games with truth or dare or other prompts that promise you an intimate evening, but usually those are just junk. Instead, gift a mutual activity kit that you’ll do together. Trying novel activities together is important for intimacy and increases chemistry as a couple. 

Sex Toys 

As kids, we wanted toys on Christmas, as adults we still want toys on Christmas too! 

Toys are flexible. No one toy is perfect only for foreplay or only for BDSM-play. These recommendations are all body-safe and high-quality toys. Avoid gimmicky toys! 

We-Vibe Touch | Multi-Functional Vibrator

We Vibe Touch is a multi-use vibrator that makes a good sexy gift or stocking stuffer.

Small in stature and unique in colors, We-Vibe’s Touch is refreshingly simple with a rumbly vibration engine and a multitude of uses. Plus, it’s waterproof for simple cleaning and rechargeable. 

Viben Sultry Vibrator Wand | Strong, External Vibrations

Viben's large vibrator wand is gentler on hands than other powerful wands.

With a unique handle design, this wand decreases the vibrations felt in your hand for an easier time holding it, and it’s waterproof for easy cleaning and flexible play. 

Tenga Egg Set | Textured Penis Sleeves

A variety gift set lets your partner discover which they might like best.

With a simple concept and affordable price, Tenga eggs are an easy sex toy to try designed for a penis. This gift set can be used solo or easily added into partnered play like oral sex or hand jobs. 

We-Vibe Verge Cock Ring

One of Lovehoney’s best-selling cock rings, We-Vibe’s Verge is app-controlled for long-distance play if you’re often separated or you can use a blindfold together at home to yield control to the remote control. 

Satisfyer Pro | Air Pressure Toy 

Anyone with a clitoris should have the opportunity to try Satisfyer’s Air-Pulse technology. It’s a unique clitoral sensation that can unlock not-yet-experienced orgasms! 

Wondering where the rabbit vibrators are? I don’t recommend them! Because of their design, they are very specific to each person’s anatomy whether they’d work or not, so I don’t broadly recommend them.

Ubberime & Godmiche Dildos 

Choose from a variety of shapes, but if you’re gifting a dildo, it should be Ubberime or Godmiche. Both shops’ products are hand-made to order with high-quality silicone with a balanced squish. They are hand-poured silicone with customizable color combos. 

Shop Shapes: Ubberime Simple | Ubberime G-Spot | Godmiche G-Spot | Godmiche Curved 

Sex Toys for the Collector

If your recipient already has a collection, here are toys I wouldn’t gift for a first toy, but are essentials in a broader collection. 

If they like strong vibrators… 

Give them the Doxy Die Cast. It’s a plug-in, utilitarian vibrator with the strongest vibrations. It compares to the iconic Magic Wand (Hitachi) with a bit more oomph. 

If they like pinpointed internal stimulation…

Give them the nJoy Pure Wand. It’s a stunning, weighted stainless steel toy that provides firm pressure with a frictionless glide. The packaging is especially luxe with nJoy, perfect for gifting too. 

If they like or want to try anal play…

Give them the nJoy Pure Plug. It’s a hefty, stainless steel butt plug with a super functional ringed base and smooth sensation. The steel takes temperature changes for additional play opportunities. 

Sex Accessories

Between toys and outfits, sexy accessories may fit into your sex life better than specific toys. 

Liberator Wedge

If you don’t own any sex furniture yet, you’re in for a treat. Sturdy, specialized pillows make sex positions easier and more comfortable, plus they don’t look sexual when left around. 

Want to know more? Learn more about sex furniture in Best Sex Furniture for Beginners to Supported Sex. 


The perfect, sexy gift stocking stuffer is simple lube. While it’s marketed as an anl lube, Sliquid’s Sassy lubricant is the best for everything with a water-based formula and thicker formula that doesn’t slide all over. It lasts well in use and is ideal for most sensitivities too. 

Love is Art Kit

This unique kit provides the materials to create an abstract artwork with body paint and a black canvas. No paintbrushes needed for this creative sex game. 

Lingerie and Clothing Gifts

Your goal with a lingerie or clothing gift should be twofold: make them feel hot and see them in a way you like, but both must be achieved. Don’t gift sexy lingerie that your significant other will feel uncomfortable in. 

A wearable sexy gift idea doesn’t need to be lingerie either. A full outfit gifted with the message, “I want to take you on a date like this. I think this is hot” can be sexier than something intentionally sexy!

When picking lingerie, follow the styles your recipient usually likes. Look at these details: 

  • Do their typical bras have padding or not? How much? 
  • Do their bras usually have an underwire (along the cup)? 
  • Does their underwear sit below or above their belly button? 
  • What is the butt style of their underwear? 

Lingerie will likely be more comfortable to wear and comfortable to show off if you match your pick to their usual preferences. While thongs are massively more common in lingerie, opt for more butt coverage if they tend to dress that way normally, for example. 

Indulgence Stretch Lace Body Suit

This subtly sexy bodysuit isn’t too strappy and remarkably comfortable, according to dozens of five-star reviews. 

Diamante Lace Bodysuit

Available in extended sizes, this bodysuit provides some comfortable coverage with layered lace. 

Mesh Unlined Bra and Panty Set

Rather than lace, this mesh set is a bit sleeker with extended sizes and four color options. 

Shop Separates: Bra | Cheeky Panty | Thong Panty 

Amanza Underwire Thong Bodysuit

From European brand Hunkemöller, this unique color and supportive underwire make for a unique bodysuit. 

Krystle Lace Bodysuit with Garters

Added garter strap details increase the sex appeal of this classic red piece. A very similar piece is available in blue for a less traditional choice. 

Shop Colors: Red | Blue

Long Sleeve Teddy

For anyone with a little upper arm insecurity, this piece’s unique long sleeve is perfect for providing some coverage while the underwire brings support. 

Skims Lounge Dress

If true lingerie feels intimidating, consider this great gift which won fans for being flattering with an almost-sheer, comfortable fabric and figure-hugging shape. 

If you want more gift ideas, read our gift guide for being a better gift shopper (even if you currently suck at it). 

You don’t have to wait till your anniversary gift for a naughty gift. The holidays can be stressful, so the excuse to re-connect with your partner is essential, plus it’s fun to open a toy you can’t wait to play with on Christmas! 

The above content may contain affiliate links. When you click and shop with our links, we receive a small commission to support our writers. As an Amazon Associate, we earn from qualifying purchases.

Want a Free Guide?

You will receive our free 19-page guide and access to our exclusive content, private invitations, and tips you’ll love.

"*" indicates required fields

This field is for validation purposes and should be left unchanged.

What do you think?COMMENTS 0